(To the tune of the Tom Jones hit Delilah, originally written by Les Reed and Barry Mason. - Credit where it's due and all that.)
I won't forget oh that night that I had that erection,
Waited for it to go down for ten
hours or more.
It was amazing,
I jumped on the bed and I
polevaulted out through the door.
My, my, my Viagra (He's only gone
and took the bloody lot.)
Why, why, why Viagra? (Did I have to
take the bloody lot?)
I could tell,
Those pills could do me no well,
But I took twenty and now I am going
through hell.
Then the next day in a permanent way
it was flaccid.
It slept like a log and then, all
the side effects start.
First came the sneezing,
And God only knows what would happen
if I tried to fart.
My, my, my Viagra (He's only gone
and took the bloody lot.)
Why, why, why Viagra? (Did I have to
take the bloody lot?)
I could tell,
Those pills could do me no well,
But I took twenty and now I am going
through hell.
Woke the next morn from a dream about porn I was turgid.
Stood to attention like a soldier
saluting the brass.
Tripped on my slippers,
My knob broke in half and the end it
went right up my... nose.
My, my, my Viagra (He's only gone
and took the bloody lot.)
Why, why, why Viagra? (Did I have to
take the bloody lot?)
I could tell,
Those pills could do me no well,
But I took twenty and now I am going
through hell.
